history

yes and no, i am formally trained to read music. no that doesn't mean sh*t.

look i grew up on a farm, very few friends, no one in my family is musically inclined other than turning on a radio. I started music my last year of high school. i took drum lessons and joined marching band. i was a percussionist. theres no real skill required there, if you can clap at the same time other people are clapping, then you could do it too. i bought my first tuned instrument, an electric bass guitar in 2008 the year after i graduated, It was how i first started learning music. i taught myself bass over about a 3-4 year span, the basics anyway, because one can never TRULY master an instrument.

around 2012, i was training to become a tattoo artist, and i was really starting to lose sight of the idea of musicianship (and lost sight of myself there too) while wrapped up in some nonsense. i did a few years in columbia trying to find my way in life, but as aspects of my life drifted away, i was no longer able to perceive my outward mannerisms and lost control of my self discipline.

after a massive decline in my behavior, i was hospitalized briefly and moved back to my parents in 2015, and i decide im not going to be a tattooist, and i pick back up my old acoustic guitar. it was purely an act of distraction or substitution, exchanging one thought process for another. that old guitar was a synsonic, that my parents got me when i was 8. it had never really been played. while living with my parents, i really sort of spiraled out, letting myself get carried away in some more nonsense, and in 2016 i move to st louis with nothing more than some clothes and that guitar.

i spent the summer and fall teaching myself guitar, every second i could i was trying something else. between new jobs and living arrangements. it was the only thing i had to distract myself with, the only way to keep my dreary thoughts from compromising my situation again. i didnt play a ton that winter or spring. but come summer of 2017 i kicked it in the ass and spent every day for the next year and a half learning as much as i could. you can watch my youtube for the results. as a means to keep disruptive thoughts out, i committed myself to learning at least one new song every month, however it got way bigger than that.

november 2018 i realize ive spent 12 years playing music to myself alone in my room, and if i ever wanted to do music professionally, it wasnt going to happen to me, I had to go do it. at the time i was mainly writing on my guitar, but i wanted to experience a DAW and the closest thing i had to that was, well... i was sitting there using two old phones, and i had two different music production apps on each, and i was using the two phones to mix and produce.... the apps were Caustic 3 and BandPass, although occasionally i would also use WalkBand.

one night talking to my then girlfriend, i started realizing a pattern in my life. making a commitment to myself and to my future, i moved home and built a studio, declaring i was going to be a music producer. i decided then, that i had a mission. i needed to explore a process of comforting relief and acceptance. i now have a fully fledged recording studio, where i spend my time writing, producing, mixing, dubbing, cutting, splicing, cooking, but most importantly, learning. thats the biggest thing that i found to be worth all this time and money, is just learning about it and about people and about how they did it, and about why it sounds like that, and how they got this effect, and i've come to the conclusion, now its my turn to share. i realized that through the thick and the thin of it, music has always been a huge part of my life, and was always prevalent in my renewal processes. from listening, to enjoying, to critiquing, and being a connoisseur, to eventually playing, practicing, and producing, ive always had the comfort blanket of music.

From 2020-2021 I've had the privilege and pleasure of working with close friend and collaborator, Consitred, and his significant, Momma Teef. In 2021 I joined DJC STL and got my first hands on performance gigs. I'm currently working towards getting independent gigs, or a residency. God willing.

Currently I can play moderately well: Guitar, Bass, Harmonica, Mouth Harp, Banjo, Violin, Erhu, Handdrums, Assorted percussions, Drum kit, Mallets, and keys. I can also proficiently operate FLStudio, Maschine 2, Traktor Pro 3, Studio One, and Reaper. I Currently own Maschine Mikro Mk2, Maschine Mk3, Komplete Kontrol M32, Komplete Audio 6, Traktor S2 Mk3, Traktor Kontrol Z1, Traktor Kontrol Z2, Traktor Kontrol X1 Mk1, Traktor Kontrol X1 Mk2, Traktor Kontrol F1, Traktor Kontrol X1 Mk2 25th Annv. Ed Vapor Grey #157 of 200. I also have unbranded or generic audio interfaces and microphones, not worth mention.

I'm so proud of the road I've traveled and everything it took for me to get here! I'm excited about where this path will take me, I'm eager to connect with people and share experiences.

i want this to be an avenue to relieve stress, embrace the uncertain, accepting the unexpected, delivering beyond fathomable expectations, being patient in hard times, all while walking in my higher self, living my best live.

i love to make music. I love to help people, give them smiles and fun, make memories. I love teaching and mentoring, like guiding people to a light but letting them discover it on their own. I love making an impact on peoples lives! i hope with your support and engagement, this dream can be thoroughly and wholly realized and articulated!

this is for those who have suffered in silence...